zen

Thanksgiving was great, but we had to feel sorry for a few people who needed to travel on Friday or Saturday. In most of Wyoming, it just wasn’t an option.

As usual, the weatherman predicted “6 to 9 inches of snow,” but it was all horizontal and we would need to spread the drifts out to see if he was even close.

South of here, closer to the mountains, there were spots that got about 6 with no wind. Sunday, the sun was out and some husbands were hearing comments like . . . “it’s a great day to put the outdoor Christmas lights up.”

Most of the boys at the coffee club have been breathlessly awaiting the opportunity to get after that annual project.  

When all those lights were taken down late last January, we made mental notes about separating the strings that were not working properly.

But then the “reasoning” kicks in and good logic says to let that go until a nice warm day next summer when we can spread them out on the lawn and do the job in short sleeves without eyes watering in a cold January wind.

Of course, that never happens.

Outdoor lighting has come a long way from the old incandescent bulbs about the size of your thumb.

It progressed to small bulbs, but any one failure could turn off the entire string, so each one of 50 had to be checked out, and somehow the string would start working again in that process. 

We never knew why, but only that the string would go out again once it was attached to the rain gutter on the house . . . 12 feet above the ground.

Now we have LED lights. Almost foolproof!  

There are a number of homeowners in Johnson County who love to put up elaborate Christmas lighting displays.  

And good for them!

Hard to believe Christmas is less than three weeks away. Blowing snow kept shoppers in town for Black Friday.

The Bench Sitters do their shopping at home for the most part. And that’s because none of them are mentally equipped to handle the confusion and waiting in line at checkouts in hopes of saving enough to pay for the gas to travel to a larger town.

Their motto is “If we can’t find it here, then we probably don’t need it.”

Meanwhile down at the coffee shop this week, the subject of “Zen Teachings” came up (the boys are doing just about anything to stay away from politics).

One of them explained that Zen is a stripped-down, determined, uncompromising, cut-to-the-chase, meditation-based Buddhism. He said defining Zen is like trying to describe the taste of honey to someone who has never tasted it before.

Some of the Bench Sitter’s favorite Zen Teachings are …

 

“Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow, and do not walk beside me, for the path is narrow. In fact, just leave me alone.” 

“No one is listening, until you pass wind.” 

“Always remember you’re unique . . . just like everyone else.” 

“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.” 

“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.” 

“If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably well worth it.”

“Some days you are the dog . . . some days you are the tree.” 

“There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.” 

“We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our arse – then things just keep getting worse.” 

“Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.”

Armed with this much wisdom, we can only assume you will be all right until we write again next week.

Sven

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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